I’m standing there in rags, covered in dirt and muck from head to toe. This is of my own doing, I was tricked and abused, but only I’m to blame. My hands hang down, I can hardly lift my head, my eyesight is blurred and my mouth feels as though it is full of gravel and blood. I’m very near the end, desperate and crushed. There is no where to go, no home, no shelter, no family or friends. Long ago, my resources were exhausted or taken without recourse. The sky is filled with low dark clouds, threatening, and darkness is falling.

Suddenly, a light pierces the clouds and above me is the King of kings and Lord of lords. I’ve never seen him on his mighty white horse, arrayed in splendor, but everyone knows of Him. He leads throngs and is the Commander of the Army of heaven, but He alone approaches in light and pure white garments. In His eyes are compassion, without judgment, but piercing, as if seeing through to my innermost being.

In the light, my condition is highlighted, shame rises urging me to hide if there was any strength left. Only pride and ego, nasty demons, remain in torment. The King speaks a word and they are gone. With complete emptiness utterly destitute, I reach out as He lifts me in embrace. Tears pour from my face in a flood of emotions, relief, thankfulness, gratitude, wonder, shock, surrender – too much to describe over a lifetime in shelves of books. 

How could the King of the Universe find me? How could He come down to endure my smell, presence and touch? He cleans and treats my wounds, binds up my brokenness and washes away the filth. He clothes me in garments of white like His royal robes. I’m in His care and beyond any rational explanation or even understanding. Didn’t He know that I’m to blame and deserved every stripe, mark and bruise. 

He speaks and his words have effect, as if they were invisible hands molding clay, reshaping, wetting dry areas till they yield to his touch, filling cracks, reinforcing weak areas. He’s remaking me from the inside out with words of power. Then, as His words have finished cleaning, healing, and restoring that which was lost, He begins to show me mysteries.

I was lost, but He knew me before I was conceived. He had brought me out and put His family seal upon me, but I was taken, deceived, and believed lies, I took matters into my own hands and plunged into selfishness, greed, and learned wickedness. Enemies put me in captivity and hard labor, but the more I worked, further in debt I became. My sin was piling up like a mountain and I was crushed under its weight. Eventually, I was spent, worthless, and left alone with demon guards, to die. 

That is when He found and saved me. Now, He reaffirmed me in His love. I belong to Him and He had never abandoned me, but so I could know just a taste of what He had endured for me, I am now in His everlasting arms, never separated from His love and grace.